I am likely less Neanderthal than you, sez DNA test

I flushed away decades of membership dues to the ACLU and EFF and gave my DNA to a company to get ancestry and medical insights. The DNA was given as saliva in a vial. I had to tell you that because I know you sat there giggling while imagining me ejecting my baby batter into an envelope.

Like many (most? all?) white people I had hope of discovery of some exotic hereditary strain. A desperate mingling between a settler on the prairie and a native tribe member (who came from a people that migrated from Asia thousands of years before, but let's go with "native"). A forbidden love so powerful it overcame pigmentation prejudice and tribal loyalties!

Yeah, I hear you. I've read Howard Zinn, too. If there were such a mingling, chances are good it was under an oppressor/oppressed dynamic. Don't harsh my One World Romance, you consarned cynic!

Results came in. 100% European.

At least my ancestors traveled around the continent a bit.

I do tend to prefer being cold, as I run warm, compared to hot temperatures. And I can get motion sickness on boats. Coming from ancestors who were mostly homebodies makes sense, if totally pedestrian.

Nothing really alarming was revealed, health-wise. I have a higher than average likelihood of macular degeneration. So I've made my first-ever appointment with an opthamologist to get that checked out as a preventive measure.

Gladly I have less-than average Neanderthal DNA (not to seem species-ist or anything, okay, I did just go intra-hominid racist right there).

You (right), ready for action. Me (left) got a stick in my ass.

You (right), ready for action. Me (left) got a stick in my ass.

It doesn't mean I'm better than you. Heck, it means I walk around all snooty with my higher brow while YOU are more likely to have greater skull capacity. So, there Ms./Mr. Big Brain! Also, as your knuckles already drag on the ground it causes you less bodily stress to pick up things off the ground. Lucky you! I'm so jealous...