Politics

I will be Ashley Judd’s Karl Rove against Karl Rove

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Since Karl Rove flushed away $400 million of plutocrat money through his shitty SuperPAC with a 1% success rate, he’s desperate for relevance. So he’s dedicating his time, like a good Republican politico, by picking on a woman and an imaginary issue at the same time.

His shitty SuperPAC (will be repeating this key phrase thrice for rhetorical stickiness) American Crossroads has funded a t.v. ad attacking actress Ashley Judd, who allegedly has something to someone somewhere she MAY consider a run against turtle Mitch McConnell for his Senate seat in Kentucky. Why run an attack ad against an entirely speculative candidate? She’s a smart, pretty lady that’s easy for dying angry toad men to croak at.

Reminiscent of the weirdly envious “Celebrity” ad run by the resentful McCain/Palin campaign that Obama was TOO popular, and his resonance with the people was a failing. A jiujitsu marvel! Hey, Amuhrican voter, why vote for the popular person? Vote instead for the loathsome person, like you!

For the record, many people who served with McCain said he was a bad pilot, petulant, entitled, and crashed planes unneccesarily.

If Judd responds to the ad or to Rove directly? Then her candidacy becomes a thing, and the need for their ad push is vindicated. If she does NOT run, they can claim victory that they daunted her. Rove has promised more attacks on Judd, because … why not? Rove loves to manufacture issues and battle them in an effort to gain applause and merit his existence. It’s a distraction for the plutocrats who otherwise would look at the hundreds of millions they’ve given Rove’s shitty SuperPAC and wonder what the hell he’s done with the money.

L-R: Not me (but could be), Ashley JuddI hereby offer my help to Ms. Judd to push back against Karl Rove. It would be very easy to get a little video going that presents Rove as a class warfare radical: “Karl Rove, a former salesman who used to at least return fear and lies on your investment. Now Rove only takes money from the old and American-ish businesses and offers empty promises and losses in return. [Insert footage of Rove counting wads of cash] Who’s the real radical? A pleasant, downhome actress who at least has a real job, or a bolshevik stealing your hard-earned capital? Tell Karl Rove to go away. Or throw a pie in his face and tell him to go back to Russia.”

Art, Music, Pop Culture

On Timberlake, on Timbaland

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Even in a boy band, Justin Timberlake awkwardly showed signs of wit. “Pop” by N’Sync had some funny, self-aware parts in the video. No, I never bought any N’Sync songs. I confess, under duress, to buying “I Want it That Way” by Backstreet Boys: a pinnacle of the Max Martin formula! The enigma about “that way”! During “Pop” there were already rumors about N’Sync members splintering off, commencing the inevitable “Now I’m a solo teen idol with a boner” phase. Oh, the heap of bodies lining that path. Don’t look. Walk on.

I eyerolled when Timberlake’s Justified album was released. Ugh. Does it come with a packet of Axe Body Spray, the external douche for douchebags? Whatever. Ignored the first few singles. Then I started liking “Rock Your Body” (video warning: Timberlake’s facial hair tries too much in the “Imma man” department. Cf: DiCaprio, Leonardo). A well-produced tribute to Michael Jackson’s Off the Wall album, with Janet Jackson in the backing vocal. Okay, at that I nodded a little cred Timberlake’s way. Also heard Howard Stern confessing to liking the album. Hurm.

Then “Señorita” came out and seemed to prove all the over-the-top Axe Body Spray milieu I feared. Especially the call & response at the end.

Then, although it had already been released, I gave a closer look/listen to “Cry Me a River”. Like the rest of the world, I initially saw the video and thought “Ah! Justin’s mad at Britney. He’s got an angry edge. That’s a lot of venom given they both told us over and over they were virgins. Whatevs.” But then I realized it was THE Timbaland in the video, and that he must have produced the song. I like Timbaland’s work with Missy Elliott: he has a good ear, daring, and the confidence to be funny in a field of dour faces.

Timberlake was an utter chickenshit during the 2004 Super Bowl halftime show, acting as if it were an accident and leaving blame on Janet Jackson. The cue for tearing at Jackson’s dress was “I’ll have you naked by the end of this song.” The moment was deliberate. Shame on him also for causing the phrase “wardrobe malfunction” to be added to our pop culture lexicon. But, worse, was the media and government fines imposed because of the shock, SHOCK that we mammals have mammary glands. The rest of the world laughed at our puritanism and prurience. Again.

Years pass. His album FutureSex/LoveSounds is released. It’s a full-on Timbaland production. They have great rapport. I bought the whole album. Interesting, solid stuff. No wisdom within it, but catchy and melodic and fun.

When punchy one night with friends, “Sexyback” came onscreen and I changed the refrain from “Go ahead be gone with it” to “Go hippie gone wigga.” It summarizes the life path of many of us males grown in hippie-strong Eugene, Oregon. That’s still what I think of when it plays.

I have considered taking a sample of the “Ya!” that ends each lyric to play in my real life to punctuate every sentence.

“Do you have any more wheat hot dog buns?” (Ya!)

“No, I’m not interested in giving money to the University Alumni Association.” (Ya!)

“Will you PLEASE pick up your juice bag straw wrapper?” (Ya!)

Seven(ish) years later a new Timberlake/Timbaland album is en route. I’ll buy it on faith.

A few whiffs of Axe Body Spray emit from the computamer/phone-amajig in the new official lyric video for “Suit and Tie” the lead single for the upcoming album. “Lyric” videos are a new-ish thing where the artist doesn’t promise to have much in the way of visual production effort, but does provide a relatively accurate transcript of the lyrics onscreen. I appreciate the anti-art of emphasizing vapid lyrics by making them visually prominent.

And am I now, in 2013, rehearsed to karaoke “Señorita” at some point, including the call & response? Yup. Le douchebag? C’est moi!

Hippie gone wigga,
D.

Activity, Art, Eating, Pop Culture

Brilliant

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“Brilliant” has long been the British equivalent of our saying “awesome” or “tubular” in the 80s. So used for inanities, used to mock such inanities, then used in defiance of such mockery it has become a space filler in British pop culture.

When it’s used in the U.S. as a weird cultural sophisticate affectation, as I’ve heard it twice at lunch during a business conversation between strangers today, it buries the usefulness of the word for maybe half a generation. Gag me with a spoon.

Activity, Parenting, Pop Culture

Mr. Rogers: “Your thoughts and your feelings are your own.”

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Read an excellent post at The A.V. Club about Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood to start the day. Fred Rogers is a wise, serene presence. A role model in many ways. I don’t know if it’s a state possible (or worth) maintaining at all times. As humans we are wired for conflict and strife with our large adrenal glands. But Rogers’ demeanor is worth recalling when needing a model for calm.

The Lady Elaine puppet scared me as a kid. There. Got it out. Shaking it off my arms now. Better.

The A.V. Club article linked to a segment where Rogers chatted with Jeff, a child in a wheelchair who explains his medical condition, challenges, that he gets frustrated like other kids, and they sing together.

When Rogers was inducted to the T.V. Hall of Fame, a grown-up Jeff was there to present the award. Rogers is surprised and genuinely moved. Then he commands the room of hardened showbiz professionals, telling them to do better (the Presbyterian minister in him comes out). It’s quite a spectacle.

I believe human beings need coarse spectacles and entertainments and catharsis of a nature Rogers may not like. But his points are food for thought.

Switching from outdoor loafers to indoor sneakers, then back again when heading out, is still a trip.

Writing

Writing sample, pt. 1

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A sample from my writing project. A main character contemplates an uhappily deposed ruler being reincarnated. As a non sequitur, including a screenshot of accounts recommended as “Similar to God” by Twitter (“God” is a Twitter account I follow):

Some of his greatness could become part of a squirrel or wolf, who for some minute reason would be the mightiest and most ambitious of its group. Commanding respect. He would find that novelty and form of reward more gratifying than the restoration of wearisome familiarity held by again holding dominion over all who beheld him. A piece of him would be content in its element, satisfied with a day’s achievement having strived for only things within its grasp. A felled deer for the pack. A stash of tree nuts and acquisition. Maintenance and cooperation with a mate. Even if the day was not perfect, the next held promise for sufficient status and shelter and nourishment. He would feel full and not lost, not like a log with its center rotted out and coated with a sap always on fire with no remedy for the crackling and burning that he took with him everywhere.

Activity

Deltalina, the flight attendant, judges you

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On a Delta flight a while ago, there was a moment in the safety video that made me laugh. My laugh was the only one I could hear, so I didn’t know if people were accustomed to it or they weren’t as struck by it. I attributed the humor to weird aesthetic on my part.

The flight attendant, with high cheeckbones, a highly worked-on face, and soft drag queen vibe wags her finger across the screen at you for even considering a smoke on the airplane (at the 1:50 mark).

On the return flight, I found myself eager to see that moment again. I was relieved to read the New York Times showing a picture of her and indicating that there’s a fan base built up. Not a convention I would attend due to apprehension over viewing a peer group in this context (when you gaze into the mirror/void it stares right back into you).

There’s a cute moment where a male flight attendant is given an artificial glint on his teeth after demonstrating how the seat may be used as a flotation device (at 4:01). This safety video has over 2.85 million views on YouTube. So, good job, Delta, at putting in little triggers that cause people to wonder “What WAS that?” and compel us to follow-up later.

ADDENDUM: After typing this up, I found a YouTube video of CNN covering “Deltalina” as a sensation back when the video only had 300,000 views in March 2008. The finger-wag and the glint in the teeth were deliberate hooks and are remarked on by the host, actress Katherine Lee, and the Delta marketing dude. So, cutesy little quirks, or deliberate research-based elements to play off the authority/captive dynamic?

Pop Culture

Will see ‘Batman Live’ only if stoned & can yell the whole time

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Yesterday I caught a commercial for “Batman Live”, a traveling stage show. I was overcome with hysterical loathing and laughed. Official commercial:

So, it’s like a roller skating show without roller skating. Batman looks inflated, can fly, has a velvet cape he flicks about inefficiently, and has acquired Robin as a gay pet. Not judging, hope they’re happy if Robin is of age, but I prefer Robin/Batman with a platonic relationship.

I understand the urge to veer Batman away from the attempts of big sociological points like the Christopher Nolan films. Who wants to see a stage show full of plot and dialogue complexities where you can’t rewind it after one of many “Huh? That doesn’t make a lot of sense. Am I missing something?” The end of The Dark Knight is an example. “he’s the hero Gotham deserves, but not the one it needs right now. So, we’ll hunt him, because he can take it. Because he’s not our hero.”

I wish the boy in this clip would say: “Shane!” If you bravely “can take it” like the not-heroic hero Dark Knight here’s a longer clip of the stage show that makes it look hammy and corny and sorely in need of songs. No question those songs would be HORRIBLE, but there’s a palpable anguish to these scenes where the characters WANT to break into song, any song, yet cannot:

In the 1970s at an Atlanta shopping mall I saw a live Batman show with Adam West and Burt Ward. They were bumping and moving around each other, reacting to audio tracks of the Joker and I think Riddler. It was scrappy. Did West and Ward have the rights to do that even after their show had been cancelled? Don’t know. But with that cheap, grungy show in memory among the things I would yell at “Batman Live”, which I would only attend if interdimensionally stoned out of my gourd, would be “SELLOUT!”

(Okay, just between us, I did raise an interested eyebrow during the commercial when Catwoman flicks her whip and then is shown from below in haughty one-quarter profile. At the 0:36 mark. You’re welcome.)

Art, Poetry, Writing

Double put-on, or not!

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So, yes, posting about Anne Sexton again. Saw this on Facebook and was amused by Anne Sexton’s reverie on camera about music:

Where are the t.v. shows capturing artist rapt in enthusiasmos instead of stars stumbling in and out of buildings and cars?

While typing up purple prose from my hand-written manuscript (Dirty parts, yay! Also: yikes and ugh!) I came across this quote from Anne Sexton I jotted down from a podcast in June 2012 (where I was in my manuscript). The quote is over-the-top. Most anyone can think of good poetry that isn’t extruded from the writer’s marrow. But then I saw this photo and laughed and decided to put it all together. Don’t know what the deal is with the dress, but fair guess it was funny. Check the cigarette cherry!

Activity

Post-mortem endorsement

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LinkedIn has a tool to make it easy to endorse people you’re connected to for particular job skills. A friend who died was among the options who came up. I gave an endorsement of one of her job skills. She was adept at it, and a record of it, somewhere, deserved to be made.